Dispatches from the edge of the world

Lessons learned during our first beach vacation as a family unit.

-The in-laws staying in a house one-quarter mile down the beach with all the good canopies is a doable distance in theory. It's much different when hauling a one-year-old and all of her fun-in-the-sun accoutrements back and forth to your own high-rise condo at least twice a day and then for dinner.

-Tourists have an ebb and flow that pounds the beach much like the tide. Low in the morning. High by midday. Eerie by nightfall.

-Standing pensively on the sandbar looking out into the ocean makes people something is wrong.

-Even if you are the better player there is something to be said about beginner's luck in regards to poker.

-It is possible to lose weight during a vacation that requires a lot of sitting around.

-If you show your in-laws a few yoga poses, it will become your reputation.

-Never invite the guy who has spent all day hitting on your daughter or niece or cousin to snap the family pictures.

-Only white people would think it's cool to wear matching white and khaki outfits for group pictures. And those who usually look at these groups as if they are a bunch of tools will recognize these glances from passersby.

-Being a reporter for a newspaper in a beach town of affluence must be super boring. But you know what I liked about their coverage of the people of the community? The diversity. White people on every page.

-It is possible not to burn during a beach vacation.

-And lastly, I have to get one of these touchscreen desktop PCs I used to write this post. Thanks for the time, Staples.