And mediocrity held sway

Thongs are great.

Of course, that is meant in the Beach Boys sense in reference to flip-flops. Where was your mind? Maybe you should look at how your living with that disappointed, furrowed brow from under which you are staring at me.

I wear them with great enthusiasm any time the temperature in my environment might peak above 72 degrees. I understand the appeal in an intimate way.

But I will not accept flip-flops with toe socks when it is 32 degrees. In combination with pajama pants. At 1:30 p.m. At a jewelry store.

"I cannot be made to worry about shoes. My time is far too valuable. And pants. Ha. I chide them. Pooh-pooh on your pants, society."

Well, I have a seven-month-old. That's going to get on there from time-to-time. Oh, synonymous with pish-posh. That's my bad.